Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Anti-terrorism bonanza!

The DC Metro police department has received warning from the Department of Fathahland Security about an uncorroborated threat - something about chicken. . .no.. . .Turkey, aaaaaand explosives. That's about it.

Oh, and there will be 20 more police officers assigned the daunting task of protecting the Metro rail from this phantom threat that may not actually be a threat, but apparently not to protect patrons from hordes of violent scumbags who throw down on a Friday night. Good to know.

Some issues here. First is that there are 420 Metro cops already, and adding 20 more is beans when you consider that "errybody know you gots to have you some moe poeleeeece" -- so what they're saying is that before Metro had one cop per 3.5 square miles, and now they will have one cop per 3.4 miles.

These 20 dudes must be some stone cold killers.

Word on the street is they are hand picked Tier -0 warriors from the likes of the Elite Team Fighters, The Original Mall Ninjas, Cat Shit One, and Cobra Command, and feature hard core operators of the likes of Lt. Curran, who successfully led a well known SEAL team mission in Beruit, Major McCoy, who cut his teeth in Delta over twenty years ago, and Matthew Temkin, father of modern point shooting. If anyone can restore peace and maintain a Turkey free public transpo, it's these guys. All is well in hand.

Now if DC could only foot the bill to add a couple more thousand of these guys, then violence and armed terrorists on the Metro would be a thing of the past!

My snark totally reminded of some of my earliest work about this very subject.

Contrary to that post though, here we are with a bona fide non-threat, and the reaction is to pump up the police force by a handful of officers. I actually see this as a good thing, and is about what I would expect from a sober local government; just enough ink to make it look like you put a check in the box, but not enough to constitute a sound effort that would be unrealistic. That way, you fulfill your public duty to respond, it looks like you're doing something impressive, but in reality you're not going to have armor clad SWAT cops with automatic weapons and the bare minimum amount of training riding about with the proles. Maybe the powers-that-be will change their mind about that, and that would suck for DC folk, and I would make fun of everyone for it, but at the moment everything seems to be working snickety snick.
Post a Comment