How many reloads does it take to shop at Wal-Mart?

This is beyond scary:



This is a good way for someone's little prince or princess to get shot to death by a scared shopper.  As I've mentioned before, there are folks out there (like me) who might not have the option to leave the area.  There are some who would casually say to let the cops handle the mess, which I agree with whole-heartedly, but what happens when the 300+ kids decide that the watermelons they're throwing just don't splatter enough, and they turn towards your cart with your kids.  If you don't think that will ever happen, are you willing to bet the lives of your children on it?  I'm not.

Teenagers or not, the disparity of force is overwhelming here even if they were all eight years old; and it's been well established that mobs like this tend to get violent in a heartbeat.  I'm still of the mindset that I would try to get out with my family if I can, but if not I would back my kids into a corner and try to keep the savages away.  Seeing a mob like this one in a small area makes me think a lot less of two spare magazines.

Airgun safety

Most gunnies get that you should keep your firearms away from small children (when you're not out shooting with them) or from kids who are not mature enough to be trusted with them while you're away, but consider that your firearm policy should also include airguns.

I was several years younger than these kids and I had access to both airguns and firearms whenever I wanted, but never went out shooting children with them.  It wasn't even a consideration.  Wow!

Mission impossible

I love these. I used to be the dick that sent the FNGs out to various places to pick up grid squares, six gallons of rotor wash, the keys to the drop zone, squeegee sharpeners, cordless extension cords. . . .you name it. You know who you're clicked with too when the FNG's mission is perpetuated by your buddies who quickly send them over to the S-4 for a bottle of K-9P lubricant, which as we all know you have to fill out a ID-10T form to get.

BREAKING NEWS!!!

It seems that the US military makes lots of noise on its bases while practicing the art of killing people and breaking their stuff! Shocking, I know. As far as I've heard, there's not a suppressing device to quiet 155mm artillery rounds when they detonate, and the suppressors for the guns themselves is a no go. Also, when you close bases and transfer personnel to other facilities, there ends up being more vehicles and noise. Again, shocking.

Well, the local rag has posted the annual "the US Army base is loud and disruptive" article, and it's just like all the others that have been posted since Fort A.P. Hill opened in 1941. To put this into perspective, it would be like me moving in right next to a farm and then writing the local paper because the air smelled whiffy.

"Calling Captain Obvious! Come in, Captain Obvious. . . .do you read me, over?"

"Gunny, I can't get him. There's no response."

I admit, I do whine a bit about all the traffic and morons flooding into this area, but I would sooner see the roads clogged with HETs and MTVRs than Camries and Explorers. And while I have no idea why all these folks would want to live here, I do understand exactly why Soldiers, Marines, Airman, and Sailors would want to have 75,000 acres of their very own to practice shooting their unique weaponry.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to write a letter to the paper to get whatever idiot(s) that keep putting yellow dust all over my cars and stuff to stop.

Why scumbags always gotta be scumbagin' up in this piece?

You may remember hearing about a dude with a CCW getting jumped at a gas station by two scumbags in Dayton, Ohio sometime last year, and he blasted one of the morons twice in the guts with a .45 caliber Glock. There's a huge thread on it with input from the man who blasted the moron at Ohioans For Concealed Carry, which also details the shenanigans that went down after the shooting by the moron who didn't get shot, along with his inbred family. Well, it appears that that second moron done gone and got himself shot too at another gas station over what looks like a drug deal gone bad.

This is a clear indicator of the fact that most people who are shot with handguns survive. Moron #1 who was shot twice last year survived, and from what I've heard is serving time somewhere. Moron #2 was shot in the neck, and one of his accomplices was shot in the legs. Both encounters were filmed, so we get an inside look into the scumbaggery.

If you want more details on both shootings, either go to the one OFCC thread above, or check out the Shooting of Moron #1 and Shooting of Moron #2 at ARFCOM.

Knives = Assault thingies

In Massachusetts, some 14 year old boy was caught with knives and brass knuckles, which are being called "Assault Weapons" by officer Bullhonkey, or whatever his name is. There was a small throwing knife set as well, and three larger novelty type knives.

Folks who know a thing or two about knives should be quick to point out that these knives are very inexpensive and are of below average quality, and are sold in flea markets and such pretty much anywhere. Want to know the reason they're so readily available and inexpensive? Because men like the look of stabby things, and cheap knives with crappy steel that won't ever see any use can fill that role well just by hanging on the wall. Folks who know a thing or two about youthful boys should be quick to point out that boys have a strong attraction to big gnarly looking novelty knives and brass knuckles. Want to know the reason? Because they're boys! I know it's hard to believe, but boys in today's time love pointy stabby things just like boys two thousand years ago did. Weird.

Didn't some wise dude from some old book say something about there being nothing new under the sun? I think today we use a term along the same lines - "Boys will be boys."

The boy in the article may or may not have said something about using a knife against some unamed somebody (we'll never know; they took down the boy's facebook page), and based on this he's now in a heap of trouble. The question to ask now is whether officer Bullhonkey also confiscated all the knives from the kitchen and then made especially sure to remove anything from the house made of metal. The best throwing knives I've ever had were made from grinding a point onto some of my mother's butter knives (sorry mom!); and I made swords, knives, and metal knuckles from old bed frames and scrap metal around the yard. I made two solid pairs of 'chucks from door chains and hickory that I cut and formed myself; I made a miniature bow and arrow from Constructs, a rubber band, and 1/4" dowel rods from a toy Tee pee and used it to kill birds and rabbits, and I've made things far deadlier than all of this stuff combined that I won't even talk about here.

Looking at those shiny brass stars on officer Bullhonkey's shoulders, I could easily use them make any number of edged assault thingies that would definitely make the day more interesting. Maybe some fangs; they could tear out a jugular vein like nobody's business! OOooo. . . oooo. . . . I know. . . .I could make arrow tips! I bet they would work better than the arrow tips that I made from bone harvested from squirrels I slayed with a slingshot.

Try as you may, you won't stop boys from making cool weapons from any materials they can get their hands on. When you're a boy, the world is your deadly oyster, and all it takes to capitalise on this is an active, youthful mind. Why this is lost on the crazy people interviewed in the article's video is the question of the day. I guess some people lose sight of where they came from (or maybe I'm crazy for making weapons out of anything I see). These days, I'm having a blast making things that hold weapons, like this holster I made last night:




Boys will be boys. . . .

Perpetual anger for anger's sake

If you didn't see what I did there with the post title, "anger" can't have a sake, because anger is an action committed by a being, and not an actual thing that's capable of committing action. Why that is important in this post is relevant to this quote by some perpetually angry muslims:

In an e-mail message, the Taliban accused "the invading infidel authorities" of trying to calm the situation with two "so-called shows of apology, but in reality they let their inhuman soldiers insult our holy book."

That is my emphasis there, as I note that a book made from glue, leather, and dead trees cannot be insulted. Insult is a feeling that is felt by a being, and as such a book is incapable of feeling insulted because it is a book. It was crafted by men's hands. That fact seems to be lost on some of the people who read it who have more extreme views. I mean, I love the bible more than any other book, but I'm also aware that the Word is not restrained to ink and paper, and thus it can't be destroyed. Do you know what I do with a worn out bible? I toss it in the trash, because it's worn out, that's what. Is it an insult to God? Absolutely not, because if a book fashioned by man's hands (or a machine in this day and age) is treated like it's the Thing, and not merely a means for us to see the Thing (the shadow of the Thing), than the book is elevated to being more important that the Thing, and thus an idol. I know I can't destroy God's Word because it can't be destroyed, so the act of tossing a trashed bible away is insignificant; I intend only to find another in any form that my physical body can use.

Wasn't this a hidden lesson in The Book of Eli? If the Taliban can send email, surely they can find that movie on Netflix and straighten themselves out. Then again, if they're so ignorant to put dead trees ahead of their chosen religion, than they probably aren't smart enough to catch the message.

What these guys are saying by getting worked up over this is that the pages the Koran is written on is more important than its content. The book is not what's important, but what's in it; getting angry about the destruction of the book is a de facto way of admitting that the content cannot survive being outside of perishable materials constructed by an underpaid worker pulling the handle of a machine. That's not the sort of idea that I would want associated with my religion.

Now I have to ask, is there like a publication or regulation telling you what to do with a worn out Koran? People do wear them out, I presume, and if not, than they have no business getting bent out of shape about it, as they're not demonstrating that their religion is of such importance that they can give it the same or more attention than the average law student gives to a law book. Is every Koran that has ever been made still in existence? What happens if you destroy one accidentally, like if your house burns down while you're out firing rusted rockets at US Blackhawk helicopters, and you come home from a hard day's jihad to find the ashes of your Koran in your mud hut? Is that. . . . . .a sin?

I'll tell you what. For discussion's sake (snicker!) I'll concede to the Taliban that the Koran can, in fact, be insulted, if they will concede that the Koran can also be insane in the membrane, or hot for teacher, or horny. There, Taliban. I've anted up; now it's your call.

Yes, I'm mocking this whole thing with humor, but while you're nodding your head in agreement, hopefully laughing Cheerios and milk through your sinuses, know that this is no different whatsoever with Americans getting mad about flag burning. "It's an insult to the flag!" Sure thing, buddy; but maybe you should let that flag be destroyed because I overheard it coveting your wife and bearing false witness against its neighbor.

**ETA: I forgot to add this:




***ETA: Holy smokes!! This isn't a group of angry muslims we're talking about here; it's a full blown riot! It looks like half the country has shown up at the US embassy in Kabul to burn the Americans over 70 burned books. This fiasco looks strikingly like when Oaklanders burn the town to the ground because the Raiders lost yet another game. And I love how the protesters are chanting that we have no respect for them or their religion when we've spent over a decade dying on their soil so that they can have a country where the world will respect them and their religion. Awesome.

Don't tempt the savages

Fells testified that the female victim, whom he did not know personally, got out of her vehicle, “came up to me and spit in my face. She was cursing at me."

Fell’s cousin, Austin Morris, whose charges were dropped in this case, stated that the spit landed in Fells’ eye and “was enough to see it drip and run down his face."

The victim was shot in the back by Fells for her stupidity. Before you say it, I'm not condoning what Fells did in any way shape or form; by his own admission he's untrustworthy and deserves his 12 year sentence. What I am saying is that if you don't want to win stupid prizes, than don't play stupid games. There is no reason in the world to spit in somebody's face, and if you do it and don't get shot by some jackass, then you will more than likely get a brutal beatdown at the very least. Same goes for arguing over parking spaces and throwing insults about people's mommas at strangers; you don't know if John or Jane Q. Public is wrapped real tight, so it's best to not provoke the savages.

Fortunately both morons survived this encounter. Hopefully some of this area's more high-strung residents read the article and take the lesson from this and apply it to their day to day lives. I'm sure it's no different in other parts of the country, but folks around here are fed up, and because of that they tend to disregard the "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" and instead resort to all sorts of tactless behaviour. So stop flipping the bird, insulting, spitting, ramming cars on the interstate with your dumptruck, ***ETA: stabbing drunks and fist fighting, and generally acting like you don't have any sense, take a breath or two and calm down, and your chances of getting maimed or killed by a psycho will fall dramatically.

US Army uniform insanity

The Army is again looking at changing the camouflage pattern and uniform for combat. There are some really crappy patterns in there that they're looking at, which means that that's what the Army is likely to chose if the past tells us anything.

The Marine Corps did it right with the Woodland and Desert digital camo, as they realized early on that one pattern does not work in every environment. With that, the uniform is designed well, is rugged, and feels like pajamas compared to the starched Woodland BDU. If you've never had the pleasure of wearing the Army ACU, it's a shitty piece of shit; quite literally the opposite of the Marine Corps uniform. Going to the Multicam pattern was a smart move overall, I think, but now the Army is poised to piss away more funds on camouflage pattern trials.

Menace to society

This post is many parts; the lesser of the post being the first, which is that coyotes in King George's county, Virginia are now in an almost continuous open season, and hopefully this will extend to other surrounding counties, as my county is starting to see their population increase. I take issue with some parts of this ordnance, the main one being that if you use a rifle, it has to be larger than .22 caliber. I'd love to see some evidence of how this regulation was established, and would enjoy seeing some bureaucrat publicly defend it. It's asinine. If you frequent predator forums, you'd be hard pressed to miss that hunters note the faster calibers being the ones that put coyotes down quickly, and thus "ethically" like the DGIF official wants. The gist of it is hunters have had well hit coyotes run off after being hit with larger calibers with less velocity, and anchored them well with the same hits with zippy small caliber rifles. Call it what you want, but there's definitely a trend. My guess is that this regulation is put here now to make sure that icky AR rifles don't end up being the killing tool for coyote hunters.

I'm going to go off on a tangent for a minute: this caliber restriction applies to whitetail deer hunting as well, and I've never seen any scientific evidence or studies that show that .22 caliber bullets are less effective than anything larger. The .223 Remington cartridge is a premier deer round in states where it's lawful, but general public ignorance and baseless ordinances have led them to be demonized. I've argued this with people for years, and none of them can offer anything other than "it's not powerful enough." Do you have proof of that claim, because I've seen evidence that says otherwise.

Interestingly enough, many hunters that I've known throughout the years who subscribe to this bullshit tote a magnum caliber rifle that they can't shoot because they flinch with it on every shot, and believe it has more "knockdown power" because it's so biiiiiiiiiiiig. I've tracked a ton of hit deer for them, too, some of them where the hunter felt confident to shoot a 180 lb running doe square in the ass because their cartridge case has a belt, and that bullet will definitely make it to the vitals, sure. "IT'S A GREAT BRUSH GUN!!!!" - my personal favorite. To be blunt, I've tracked more dog-sized Virginia deer hit with a magnum than I can count, but never had to track one hit with a .22 Hornet, .22 Magnum, or .220 Swift. I don't account this fact to the caliber, but to the fact that the trigger man did his job and hit them properly, and did not rely on 30 extra grains of powder, 2 more millimeters, and piss poor shooting to get the job done. Just to ensure that this dead horse is adequately beaten, if you claim that to use a .223 Remington or other similar caliber cartridge on deer, you have to "hit them just right," you are implying that using a larger cartridge means that you don't have to hit them just right. Get it?

Good. Moving on.

The "no hunting on Sundays" is an archaic regulation that needs to be repealed. I don't know where it comes from, but to my knowledge folks believe that God will be angry with them if they're in their treestand on Sunday vice raking leaves or fixing the sink. The Lord didn't smite David for eating the showbread, and I don't think He will condemn Elmer Fudd for sending a ballistic tip through Wile E's guts. If you believe otherwise, then I invite you on a witch hunting journey with me in Salem. It'll be swell! My county this year has had a continuous doe-day this hunting season in a vain effort to control the population, and if they let hunters hunt one more day out of the week, a balance in the herd might be struck. The insurance companies would surely be happy with this concept, as they wouldn't have to shell out millions every year because of all the deer hit by vehicles.

Next up on my list of shit I don't like is this:

King George doesn’t allow the use of high-powered rifles during hunting season. Bullets fired by more powerful weapons travel farther, and that can be dangerous in areas with dense populations or flat terrain, which is the case in King George.Caroline County has the same restriction.

Now, this DOES NOT apply to shooting coyotes in the county -- it's for deer hunters -- but going off on a tangent again (I can do that, you know) I note that this is an asinine regulation, and it's one that plagues many counties around mine. Whoever came up with this should be kicked in the balls. The concept is that rifles are dangerous because the bullet has the potential to go further, so some counties only allow hunting with shotguns and muzzleloaders. The problem with that is that that concept is baseless:

Of Pennsylvania’s approximate 900 miles of border with other states, it was found that the centerfire rifle was unlawful along the entire boundary with the exception of western Maryland. They found that in no case was any state able to provide definitive information upon which they based their decision. In fact, most reported that they simply responded to the public perception that shotguns were less dangerous than centerfire rifles. At that time, PGC staff found there was no data to support the contention that shotguns and muzzleloaders are any less risky than centerfire rifles. They found, instead, that in the “shotgun-only” states this appears to be “an issue driven by emotion and politics rather than sound scientific data.”2

You mean to tell me that laws and regulations subjected on Pennsylvanians was born out of politics and emotion instead of facts? Weird. Don't quote me, but I think this sort of shenanigans has happened elsewhere in the country.

Anyhow, the conclusion from the linked study from Pennsylvania is that shotguns are "more risky" when fired from the ground at a zero degree angle, and Paw Paws 30.06 is "more risky" when fired at an angle, such as from a treestand -- but the risk factor in the study is based on the "danger zone" after the projectile has ricocheted, which is based entirely on the distance that it travels. My point is that who cares if the round ricochets one mile or ten: it's one bullet, and it's dangerous no matter how far it goes before it lands. It would be different if the bullet rained death down on everything below it during its brief flight, whereas the further and longer it flies, the more harm is done. That's not the case though; what we're talking about here is if a hunter fires a rifle at a deer, and the bullet skips off a rock and heads out of the pasture, that if it strikes Timmy in his back yard a thousand yards away it's "more safe" than if the round came down and struck grandma in the next county. Sorry, but that dog don't hunt.

According to the PA study, the criteria for the "danger zone" came from studies done by the US military on the ricochet distance for small arms for military ranges. So yeah, a two mile danger zone behind Edson Range is a good idea because thousands of Marine recruits fire millions of rounds there, and all those rounds will fall in a predictable area. Finding out how big that area is and making sure some developer doesn't build a Kroger there is in the public's interest. How this somehow applies to Elmer and his carbine is anyone's guess; I just don't see how a shotgun slug bounding half a mile is less dangerous than a .30 caliber Accubond skipping two miles. The telling part to me is the chart on page 26, where it shows that the probability of a rifle round ricocheting when fired at a 10 degree down angle is 38%, and the probability of a .50 round from a muzzloader or a shotgun slug ricocheting from the same angle is 91%; what I get from this is that there's less chance of an errant projectile to begin with if I stick with a rifle, damn the distance it flies. Go ahead and look that chart over real well. See how much more probable a ricochet is when you don't use a rifle?

It seems to me that we have the dumbest possible people struggling to make public policy, which I guess is better than letting them figure it out on their own using common sense, or worse, emotion.

Moronic statement to start the year

The shooting renewed debate about a federal law that made it legal to take loaded weapons into national parks. The 2010 law made possession of firearms subject to state gun laws.

Bill Wade, the outgoing chair of the Coalition of National Park Service Retirees, said Congress should be regretting its decision.

"The many congressmen and senators that voted for the legislation that allowed loaded weapons to be brought into the parks ought to be feeling pretty bad right now," Wade said.

This piece of jackassery is in response to the sociopathic gunman who shot and killed a Park Ranger at Mount Rainier park shortly before stripping off what little protective clothing he had and wandering around until he died from exposure. The madman obviously didn't read the law, as shooting up house parties and federal agents and blowing through police checkpoints is illegal. If we are to take Mr. Wade seriously, the gunman may still have left the scene of his previous shooting with his guns, but would have stopped cold when he reached the boundary of the park, as violating firearms law is all illegal and shit.

It's a wonder why his "misconduct discharge", domestic violence charges, pending mental health evaluation, and restraining order didn't bar him from owning firearms. Maybe there should be some laws there which would certainly have prevented this tragedy just like keeping parks gun free would have. It's only common sense.

***ETA: Great minds think alike! A post at Hell in a Handbasket discusses the same shooting and the same moronic statement from Mr. Wade.

Mommas, don't let your hippies grow up to be toilet technologists

As much as it angers me to do it, I have to again revisit the topic of toilets because this shit is pissing me off (the pun - flows through me, it does)!!

This is in no way gun related, but it has to be said.

The idea of low flow toilets had to have been conceived by stinky hippie engineers who dreamed of an invention to torture the common man. Little did they know about the severe water overuse in B.F., Virginia because toilets in a certain commercial building were flushed at least three times per use. There are babies suffering somewhere, in some forgotten country probably ending in -stan, because of this insane overuse of water here. Trust me.

Secondary to the malicious intent of torturing mankind and making foreign babies suffer is the thought that by making toilets use less water, somehow polar bears and penguins would have more ice to sit on. Or some shit like that. Saving water is what hippies do, damn the reasons and consequences, and they thought that that end could be accomplished in the engineering department of American Standard. What they in fact did is create toilets that have to be flushed, re-flushed, and re-flushed again, and possibly re-flushed several more times in order to achieve the same outcome as a toilet that uses twice as much water in one flush, which runs counter to the "low flow" label that they're branded with.

"High efficiency," my ass.

When using a toilet in the building where I work, there are always leftovers if you dare to check. Every single time. Before you even use the toilet, the very first thing you have to do is flush; and once you're done, it's a mandatory two flushes at the very least, and there will still be leftovers. And if your portion size is. . . .ummmm. . . let's say larger than industry standard, sometimes you wind up with a turd stuck fast to the side of the bowl that a measly 1.6 gallons of water just can't dislodge. That's a fact. With all the snorting toilets in the men's room, and the muffled toilet snorts heard through the wall from the ladies room, you would think a sounder of agitated warthogs lived here.

So the end result is that more water is used instead of less, which could all have been avoided by leaving toilet technology well enough alone; something some folks just can't seem to do. Accept that there are some things in life that can't be improved upon: take forks for example (You now associate turds with forks. Thanks, CTone!). There isn't anything that can be done to improve how forks function. Forks design has stayed pretty much the same for hundreds of years, if not thousands, but you can bet that some hairy toed hippie has thought of shortening the fork's tines to make people use less food or something, and thus save the moose. Following in that logic, maybe we can save the Teamster population by making shovels smaller, too; or make poop disappear just as well as 3.5 gallons by using half as much.

Fix it! Or at the very least, add a selector switch. I mean, we have adjustable gas blocks. Why not adjustable toilet flow regulators?

"Oooof. This one's gonna be a doozie! Better switch from "standard" to "dirty.""

If ARFCOM ran a Deadliest Warrior episode

Could a modern day Marine Expeditionary Unit, sent back in time, destroy the Roman Empire? Someone asked the question, and ARFCOM answered. From my unofficial tally, it's about two-to-one odds against the Marines for some of the dumbest arguments imaginable. It really got me thinking though about if ARFCOM ran a giant episode of Deadliest Warrior. There would be a complete list to the cartridge of all the shit an outfitted MEU has at its disposal, from M9s to M1A1 Abrams main gun rounds, against all the cleverness (snicker!) and weapons a 2,000 year old civilization had:

(In an overly enthusiastic, raspy voice) - Marines, the Deadliest Warriors of the modern age attack with bloodthirsty hunger wielding weapons of terrifying awesomeness and DEEEEEEEATH!

(Geek voice) - "Here we have a modern fighting force with modern weaponry. The Marines, while honorable, courageous, and committed to accomplishing their mission, often forget their sole purpose in life of killing everything they see and get sidetracked due to raging hormones and desire for strong drink. Some of the weapons the Marines will be using on the show are:"
(Raspy voice)
The M16 A4 rifle!
The M9 pistol!
The M240Bravo machine gun!
The M249 Squad Automatic Weapon!
The MK19 machine gun firing 40mm grenades of DEATH!!
The LAV-25 Amphibious Assault Vehicle with 25mm automatic gun!!
The M777 Howitzer firing 155mm high explosive rounds!! OF DEATH!!
The Bell AH1Whiskey SuperCobra!!! IT'S AIRBORNE DEATH!!!

(Raspy fake voice again) - "But the Romans strike back with a deadly arsenal of their own!!!!"

(Geek voice) - "The Romans were like smart and shit, and were known to change their tactics to win decisively against other large, primitive and starving forces fighting in massed clusters with weapons made from bronze. Here are some of the things our Romans will be using against the Marines on the show:"
(Raspy voice)
The Gladius! Three feet of low carbon steeeeel!
The Javelin!! Five feet of wooden DEATH!!!
The Shield!! Thick wood and bronze protected a Roman warrior FROM DEATH!
Whores! Slutty assassins who woo warriors!! TO DEATH!!
Chlamydia! Burning penal discharge of DEATH!!
Syphilis! The rashy kiss of crotchety DEATH!
Sour Wine! OF DEATH!!


(Geeky Canadian voice) - "I think the Romans are going to win this one. They were unbelievably clever, definitely enough to defeat the Marines' two millenia of technology, tactics, and complete knowledge of history. Aaaaand, nobody has ever thought of Marines being clever enough to adopt their strategy to defeat a numerically superior force. Also, a Marine Expeditionary Unit has a finite amount of ammunition on board, estimated at about one and a half million small arms rounds and hundreds of thousands of high explosive rounds, as well as a supply of batteries and fuel for only a month of operations. Once those run out, they're fucked."

(Other Geek voice) - "Yeah, you make a good point about the Marines having a limited supply of ammunition. But the Romans though had an infinite number of warriors who were not only super skilled with close range weapons made of primitive steel, but they were also like mad smart, too! They had so many warriors that they would never run out. When four Marine Corps M1A1 tanks annihilate a one hundred thousand strong army with all their leadership in a ten minute engagement, Rome would simply send in a hundred thousand more. The beauty is that Roman warriors don't even need training; they just wander out of the morning fog and stand ready in formation."

(Geeky Naval Special Warfare guy) - "I'm going to go with the Marines on this one. The Roman army, while admittedly super clever with their aquaducts and all, would not operate all that well as a fighting unit once all their generals and leadership were assassinated silently in their beds at night by green faced Marines with night vision goggles and suppressed rifles. And considering the devastation that a 155mm artillery barrage has against a force wearing body armor dispersed amongst rocks and cover, much less a formation of malnourished troops shoulder to shoulder in an open field wearing leather and wood, I'd say that if there even was a head on battle, it would be over in two minutes. One or two battles per region and that whole area would fall, which would destabilize the empire, and then the Marines would own all the harlots and booze they wanted."

(Geeky guy) - "Hmmmmm. Good points all around; it looks like it's going to be a tough call. But once we get all the data loaded into our sim, it will give us the answer."

(Raspy voice) - "Representing the Roman army are two Greek cooks from Manhattan, both direct descendants from warriors who fought in the Roman army."

(Greek cook) - "We're gonna kick their asses! Romans had gleaming muscles and thick chest hair under all their ridiculously effective armor, and had trained from before birth to wield a sword! No contest."

(Raspy voice) -"Representing the Marine Expeditionary Unit are two Marine Corps war veterans who, as Force Recon Snipers, killed thousands and thousands of terrorists across the globe using the devestating power of combined arms!"

(Marine, with a huge dip in his mouth) - "This is a fucking joke, right? I mean, we aren't talking about a MEU occupying a large land area or conquering every last city; all we need to do is slaughter a few hundred thousand Romans and the empire will break up. We'll take Rome on the first night!"

ETA: (Raspy voice) -- "WHO! IS! DEADLIEST!!!"

Yes, I have a wild imagination floating around in all this bitterness.

That song is playing in my head again

It's the song they call Tinnitus, played by a band called IneverworehearingprotectionwhenIwasyoung. It goes like this: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

When I was a kid, all I did was shoot guns. All day. I had several counties of woods and fields to wander and hunt, and that was what interested me. Even before I could drive I was competent with big magnum rifles and handguns, and had taken down countless deer with a 7mm Magnum and a .300 Winchester Magnum I borrowed one hunting season. When I was in High School, while all the cool kids were out getting liquored up and partying, I would be proned out on mom's dining room table with a Marlin Glenfield Model 25 sniping crows in the back yard out the back door. It made me a decent marksman, but it also gave me substantial hearing damage.

Back then hearing protection came in the form of foam plugs, or dad's cigarette butts. Either way, to keep the song from playing after you broke a shot you had to completely block out ambient sounds, which was not desirable if you wanted to also be able to hear your quarry. Spending so much time in the woods, I never wore hearing protection at all for more than half my life; and because of that I have recurring tinnitus.

It happens randomly several times a month and usually goes away within an hour or two. Not this weekend, though; I woke up Saturday morning and my left ear was ringing so bad that it made my hearing in both ears almost non-existent, and continues now as I write this post. My wife came home from work and was wondering why the hell I had the TV blaring so loud. I could barely hear it, like I was underwater. My kids would be talking to me not two feet away and I just couldn't make out what they were saying. It gets really bad like this several times a year, and can take a week or two to go away.

In my youth, I knew damn well I was damaging my ears with all the gunfire, but I didn't care because I thought I was tough. Now I see what a moron I was, and I wish I could go back in time and kick my own arrogant ass, then sport the dollar or so for some ear plugs. Idiot. I'm right handed, which means my right ear is turned slightly away from the muzzle when I shoot, so it's the better ear of the two. Both ears are bad enough that I had to get a waiver to get into the Marine Corps and Army National Guard because of a wide range of sounds that I could no longer detect, which shouldn't be the case for anyone under 60 years of age.

These days there are electronic hearing protectors that amplify ambient sounds, but cut out the gunfire. When you shoot, instead of the muffled "pop" that you hear with foam plugs, the electronic muffs let you hear the shot as if it was normal, but your ears are spared only the most damaging pitch. On top of that, they're affordable, so there's no reason in the world not to buy a pair and use them, even in the woods while you're hunting. I noticed that with my cheapo pair of Peltor tactical muffs, I can hear distant sounds clearly as if I were there that I cannot hear without them. They'd be a huge advantage in the woods while hunting, and would also keep the worst of the gunfire from making your ears play that song that you cannot get out of your head, ever.

Double facepalm

I found two news articles about enacting gun laws in Nevada in the wake of the Carson City shooting last month, and both of them made my jaw drop. You have to be an airhead to write or say some of this stuff, and I thought I would fisk both articles this morning.

First up is this one, and this just begs to be pointed out:

"Nevada National Guard Sgt. Caitlin Kelley, one of the victims in the IHOP attack, responded to the shooting by calling for a ban on assault weapons, which can be purchased without a background check at many gun shows or through private sellers."

It would be better written if it said that most common firearms can be purchased privately, but are mostly subjected to a background check at gunshows. That would at least not be misleading or disingenuous, unlike this:

“I can’t imagine why we are even selling assault weapons to civilians,” said Kelley, who was shot in the foot and still uses a wheelchair. “There’s no reason for an AK-47 or an M-16 or an M-4 to be in a civilian’s home.”

AK-47s, M16s, and M4s are very very rare in the US. The weapon in question was illegally converted to full auto by a man who could have cared less for any law barring him from a tool to kill people; the response to this apparently is to have one of the victims of the shooting tell everyone that psychopathic killers shouldn't be allowed to buy automatic rifles.

Washoe County Sheriff Mike Haley agreed, saying: “I don’t see any logic to having assault weapons available to the public.” But he said banning such weapons would spark a sharp response by gun-rights advocates.

You correctly answered your own question there, chief. Way to go. The "logic" to having rifles available to the public is that the public wants rifles; and for every one scumbag that uses one for harm, hundreds of thousands or more peaceable men and women put them to good use. Because they are desired by far more good people than bad, they are available; and I reckon they will stay available for a long while to the good folks in Nevada.

Going now into a full blown lie:

Semi-automatic assault weapons can easily be converted into automatic weapons — which are the same thing as machine guns — with a simple kit available online or at gun shows, officials said.

Nope. Wrong. Erroneous. How this garbage keeps getting written is beyond me, but to clear things up, you cannot buy "simple kits" online or at gunshows, or anywhere besides criminals to make rifles fire automatically. You can purchase the fire control components to make an AR rifle fire automatically, but they're heavily regulated by the ATF, and so is the receiver that those fire control parts go into. The number of these receivers is finite, and the price to own one is high. I have seen booths at gunshows that will gladly sell you an automatic weapon, legally, which will set you back at least $10,000 for a cheap one, and you will have months and months of paperwork to do before you can own it. You can manufacture your own full automatic weapon in your basement out of scrap metal if you are mechanically inclined, or if you have access to metalworking equipment you could likewise turn some rifles into machine guns. You can also buy all the parts you would need to make a bomb from your local Home Despot, and assembling one would be way less effort than making a semi-auto AK into an automatic weapon, and the killing potential would be much higher. Chew on that for awhile.

This line was my first facepalm:

What happened at the IHOP “was as close to a war as most people will ever come, and they were helpless to defend against it,” Haley said. “But because of our love affair with weapons, we are subjecting the public to this type of violence. If this is going to change, the public has to stand up and demand change.”

This may sound cold, but being "helpless to defend" yourself is a personal choice. Sadly, the National Guard has largely taken away that personal choice by disarming Soldiers who, by their very title, are charged with guarding our nation. I'd say a lunatic shooting civilians with a rifle in an IHOP is threat to [the Nation] that could have been stopped had these Soldiers been armed, or by some yahoo eating breakfast who happened to be armed to protect his or her gift of life. How are you supposed to defend your people if you are not armed? How can you swear an oath to defend a nation and then be totally unprepared at keeping your charge? Does the public really believe that the National Guard is only supposed to shoot foreign enemies on some other soil? How the Sheriff can profess the above and then in the same breath advocate taking away the very tools to allow defense against it is bizarre.

If you really want to do a double facepalm like I did this morning, look no further than the comments to this story. It boggles the mind. A quick Google search then yielded this article that has almost the same shitty verbiage as the first, but with some extra pizaaaaaz!

"I think it's a good question to ask: Why does a typical citizen need to have an assault weapon?" he said. "I think we're at the point where we have to have that discussion. Can we protect citizens without impacting other people's rights?"

Go right ahead and have that discussion, because it's not going to go the way that you want it to go. I have to point out that a man's rights have absolutely nothing at all to do with protecting citizens, and are not measured by need. You have rights; either use them or don't, but get it out of your head that you can protect people by dishonoring them with a violation their rights.

Hey lookie! This article has lies, too:

Seven states have assault weapons bans: California, Connecticut, Hawaii, Maryland, Massachusetts, Minnesota and Virginia.

Not in Virginia; although if Old Dominion Dems have their way, they would scoop them up in a heartbeat, which is why it's been noted that we won't be seeing many of them winning elections in the near future.

Despite being diagnosed as schizophrenic, Sencion legally purchased the weapon from a private seller in California.

But you just said that these weapons have been banned in California! How can you say that they've been banned there, and then say that he legally bought them there? Great editing! These articles are the only reason why I bother to read the news.

Only you can prevent sawzall violence

EVERETT, Wash. (AP) — Police in Everett, Wash., say a woman is accused of cutting her sleeping husband's neck and shoulder with a power saw.

The story doesn't mention it, but it's apparent that there was no background check conducted on the purchaser of the saw. Anyone can just walk into a Harbor Freight and buy a truckload of these reciprocating saws and slash their husbands. It's best for the children that we enact a law to restrict the purchase of power tools to licensed construction workers so we can avoid this senseless violence forever.

The news isn't fun to read anymore

It's too depressing. This morning I open Yahoo! News to find that Andy Whitfield has died. I enjoyed Spartacus: Blood and Sand, and somehow hoped that Whitfield would return to the part because he played the character so well. His character was re-cast, and the new season starts early next year.

The first news article that caught my eye this morning though was the headline/quote from president Obama stating that "America does not give in to fear," which made me snort just a little bit. The news has been awash with stories fear for eleven days, pondering the next terrorist strike that is bound to happen at any moment. Any minute now. . . .

We have uniformed government workers sexually assaulting random Americans at airports and bus stops, F16 fighters escorting air planes to the ground, bomb scares in Boston, Kansas City, Los Angeles, and D.C. ; and in New York:

New York police amassed a display of force on Friday including checkpoints that snarled traffic in response to intelligence about a car or truck bomb plot linked to the 10th anniversary of the September 11 attacks.

Officers armed with automatic weapons were stationed at city landmarks including Wall Street, Times Square and the September 11 memorial site where the Twin Towers once stood.

[snip]

New Yorkers who have grown accustomed to bag searches at subway stations and random displays of police presence encountered increased vigilance after the threat, which prompted President Barack Obama to order a redoubling of U.S. counterterrorism efforts.

Yeah, we sure don't give in to fear not one little bit. Nothing tells me that the republic is at ease like amassed police with automatic weapons in major cities. My favorite, sweet little truffle from yesterday morning's news:

Mejia now is close to marking her fourth year as a TSA security officer. She has worked every September 11, she said. "It's somewhat an honor to be here today, to watch, to say that people are not afraid to fly, and we are here to help," Mejia said.

This is from an article titled "Travelers feel fear, resolve about flying on September 11." Someone should probably tell her that thousands, if not millions of Americans fear flying the other 364 days out of the year because of the fear of having their intimate body parts rigorously fondled by blue-glove wearing tyrants who work for the TSA.

"Nearing the end of this violation, I sobbed even louder as the woman, FOUR
TIMES, stuck the side of her gloved hand INTO my vagina, through my pants. Between my labia. She really got up there. Four times. Back right and left, and
front right and left. In my vagina. Between my labia. I was shocked -- utterly
unprepared for how she got the side of her hand up there. It was government-sanctioned sexual assault."

I know I always feel safer about travel knowing that when I get to the airport, there is a high likelyhood that some disgusting stranger in a dirty blue shirt will painfully grab ahold of my satchel; but it's awesome though and totally worth it because some spineless wimp of a man behind me will feel like these good hearted goverment agents are dilligently keeping everyone safe. Even though they're not.

Fear not, muslim friends, we're here to find terrorists. I'm clearing your minds of all anxiety." - Sarah; Team America: World Police

Have a safe day!!

Deerly beloved

What's this!?!? Can't feed the deer? Does this mean the Commonwealth can fine you if Bambi is caught gnawing on your azaleas? Can I still feed them 123 grain A-MAXes?

Inquiring minds want to know.

Really this asinine law adds up to nothing considering whitetailed deer are amazingly prolific and can eat pretty much any plant in the state. So what, putting handfuls of corn or apples in your yard is going to bring about famine and pestilence to the whitetail population?

Feeding them can unnaturally increase population numbers that damage natural habitats and can increase unwanted human-deer conflicts.

Human-deer conflicts? Like this kind? If you really wanted to reduce said conflicts, then how about rescinding that other asinine law that says folks can't hunt on Sundays. I bet in two seasons the number of vehicle/deer collisions would plummet. And how exactly does feeding them increase their population? Deer are some of the most fruitful creatures on the planet; I highly doubt saltlicks and C'Mere Deer are going to make them hornier than they already are.

Now lets talk about the "damage [to] natural habitats." Do you really think that DC has at times had 200 deer per square mile because residents feed them? I think the vehicular slaughter and mangled gardens and flower pots should be considered as damaged natural habitat, as it includes both human and deer living space. Maybe something should be done about the explosion of the deer population in highly developed areas before the state resorts to fining grandma for tossing peaches into her yard.

***ETA: I didn't catch this little gem the first time around:

The practice can also be misconstrued as deer baiting, which is illegal.

I side with Ted Nugent in that everything a hunter does to make a kill is "baiting."

Sitting in a stand watching a corn field?

Baiting!

Propped up against a tree on a ridgeline watching the creek?

Baiting!

Waiting for a buck to come back to a scrape?

Baiting!

It's all an illusion made to keep you in a particular mindset. I raise the bullshit flag on this one; if the state cares so much about a healthy deer population, they would shelf stupid laws like this one and let hunters shoot deer on Sundays.

Notice me

Virginia drivers have deplorable driving skills, and one of the things that pisses me off are drivers who do not use their turn signal.

Understanding that Notice is part of the basic principles of Contract, as well as giving Value to get Value, using a turn signal gives other drivers Notice of your intent; the other drivers get Value from knowing what you plan to do so that they can act accordingly, and the signalor (industry term) gets Value by not having the other drivers smashing into the ass end of their vehicle. Don't bother to argue with that as Contract has been well settled over thousands and thousands of years, and is way more proven than opinion.

And yes, brake lights are Notice of sorts, but they do not indicate intent. Like this morning for instance; I had no way of knowing if Incompetent Driver's BMW brake lights were an indication that there was a squirrel or other fuzzy faced creature poised precariously on the side of the road; that there was an emergency vehicle entering traffic; that the driver hit the brake pedal accidentally while scratching her overstuffed leg and will continue on or about at the same speed; or that the driver, having determined all at once that she wanted to stuff her filthy face with McDonald's latest wares, was coming to a full on stop, and had to wait to cross oncoming traffic. Without knowing that a driver is going to come to a sudden stop, it can be very easy to hit someone. That's why you're supposed to show intent.

Incompetent Driver did not give me Value, so by all means I should have blared the horn at her stupid ass, and by that I would have been giving her Value as she may have learned to use that stem thingy hanging off the steering column and avoid preventable collisions in the future. I would probably have received Value indirectly, as my children in the back seat would not have to hear me swearing nasty things, thereby parroting them in company of my wife.

I don't make it a habit to stomp on my brakes and come to a full stop every time I see brake lights. I'm not asking for y'all to come over to my house and mow my lawn; just give me some fucking Notice.

This is why I don't fly anymore

His ordeal began last Friday when airport security in Freeport, Bahamas found a .32-caliber bullet inside his fanny pack. He was charged with possessing ammunition and sent to a jail in Nassau. Lapp says he thinks he left the bullet in his pack after a hunting trip.

How would you take it if this happened to you while traveling with family on vacation? I'm certainly capable of overlooking a shell casing or bullet in a travel bag. How about you?

All of these so called security measures that have been enacted around the world rely on policy and not thought. One security yahoo with the capability to produce conscious thought would have kept an innocent man out of jail if he or she were only able to act on what they know, and not on what a zero-tolerance policy tells them to.