A shooting victim at the funeral of a shooting victim, in Chicago. Why, there aught to be a law or something to prevent stuff like this from happening. Maybe make the whole daggone city a place that is free from idiots with guns. What a swell idea.
Also, TSA screeners conducting an intense scrotum search found a bunch of heroin on a traveler. Oh wait, did I say TSA screeners? My mistake; it was Customs Inspectors, and they weren't sexually assaulting him when they found the drugs, they were interviewing him. Weird. Who would have known that old fashioned police work would produce results?
And again, hailing from Stafford, Virginia we have a psychotic woman ramming her car into another car, all the while her 1 year old is safely strapped into the back seat. Now this may come as a huge surprise, but the whole incident was allegedly started over a man. Shocking!
Kansas City shows off its lunatics with some parents who were off doing who knows what while their crazy ferret ate the fingers off their four month old. Leaving your kids in an air conditioned car while you buy a lottery ticket is grounds these days for state charges, so these people had to know that it was a bad idea to leave their infant at home alone. With an animal that is known to bite.
Now, as you go about your day, look to your left and your right at all the friendly people you encounter and know that at least one of them is batshit crazy. Pay attention to your surroundings at all times.