Give us this day our yearly CTone

My fourth and final child - a son - was born last night. At 9 lbs 10 ounces, he was the grand finale for sure. Our other kids were born nice a simple and quick, while this one gave us quite a scare; mother and baby are doing great though.

I have now had four kids within four years. For a few more days anyways, I'll have a three year old, a two year old, a one year old, and a newborn. I am truly blessed.

Blogging will be light for a few days.


***Update: Just made it back home last night after five days in the hospital. Still have a big few days ahead with doctor's appointments, sleepless nights, and family visiting their new member. I would have blogged while in the hospital but the internal internet wouldn't allow me to visit blogger.com. Weird. I thank y'all for the comments, and I'll get back to normal blogging here hopefully this weekend.

Barrels, bullets, and other things

I got word that the Les Baer barrel for my MK12 Mod 0 build has been completed by ADCO and is in the mail. I had to correspond with Steve, who works there, to give him the details of what I was looking for. They had my barrel for just over a week before completing the work and sending back out, which is impressive.

I need a few more parts to finish the build, but have run out of funding for the time being. I do have pictures of the upper being fitted to the lower, as well as some Alumahyde coating pics. When I get the barrel I will take some more and put up a post.

Now that I'm back to carrying the Glock, I'm going to upgrade my carry ammo from Black Hills 124 grain +P to probably Federal's 147 grain +P HST. They are more affordable than the Black Hills, and use better bullet technology than the XTP which is made by Hornady. I think that I'm going to holster shop for the 1911 for AIWB; for the moment, the Glock is set up for it and the Zack holster is working well; but while I shoot the Glock fine and all, I don't shoot it nearly as well as I do a 1911. It takes more effort to put rounds exactly where I want them to go in a hurry. I am way more practiced with the 1911, and can manufacture my own ammo for almost nothing, which is another bonus. I'm on Custom Carry Concepts' email list for a Shaggy holster when they start making them again in the fall, but I might look for something for my Kimber and give that a whirl, too.

Also, I may drop off the radar for a few days -- just giving you a little heads up. My annual allotment of responsibility is about to go up by 25% any day now, and I'll give a report on that when it goes down. I can't wait. Hopefully by then I will have all the rest of my Mod 0 parts and can sneak out of the house for some well deserved time at the range.

Crazy people roundup

Sometimes I check out the news and there are so many stories that defy belief that I feel compelled to clump them together and share them with the world. Kind of like Drudge (where I find some of these stories), but only for bizarre stories of desperate debtors armed with strange weapons.

First up, a school principle and staff in West Virginia were smoking Meth in the principle's office. Why not; it's well known that West Virginia folks don't have teeth anyways, so it's not like they're going to get meth mouth from it. I kid, I kid.

Hailing from Maryland, a celebrated cop is charged with 12 felonies for allegedly trying to seduce a kid with alcohol and, failing that, pistol whipped him and shot him twice in the back. The cop's story is obviously not in concert with the above, but the whole thing is under investigation and there's apparently enough merit to the kid's side of the story that even Prince George's County police are cringing. I couldn't imagine the hell of being a former cop incarcerated for trying to rape a kid.

In Colorado, some homeless dude robbed a cupcake store armed with a blood filled syringe. The man claimed it was tainted with AIDS, but that's irrelevant; if someone comes at you with a syringe -- whether empty or not -- that person is a deadly threat and should be treated as such. I wouldn't risk hobo guy jamming a needle of any sort in me or my family. He would probably get shot. I do award him one brownie point though for being resourceful.

In New York, a former boxer is pissed because he didn't qualify as a TSA screener because he only has one hand. That's a stupid reaction on his part - he should know that premeditated sexual assault is done way more efficiently by scumbags with both their hands. I was surprised the most though by the discovery that Americans voluntarily apply for the TSA screener job; this whole time I thought DHS operatives kidnapped them in the middle of the night from Serbia or some shit. Why would anyone willingly try out for that?

There were two mass shootings in Washington, the second one being a husband who walked into a nightclub in a casino and gunned down his wife, who was grinding it up with her new man while supported by her wild, fun-loving sisters. They all got shot too, but somehow survived. The husband will hopefully be imprisoned for the rest of his life, and I'm sure the wife will probably never ho-down with a lover while her husband is at large again.

There are many more stories, but these will do for now.

Season 3 of Deadliest Warrior

I watched it last night (somehow amidst the roar of the kids) -- a matchup between George Washington and Napoleon Bonaparte. I thought they did a good job. Whether I agree with the show's logic or results is not that important to me; it's excellent entertainment. Watching crews fire a cannon at anatomically correct targets is friggin' cool, and getting a glimpse of cavalry tactics via sumdude shish-kabobbing a bleeding man made torso with a replica of Washington's sword is too awesome to miss.

Overall I can agree with their assessment between the two generals. I gave my hat tip as far as strategy and tactics to Napoleon, and I favored Washington for his strong leadership. The show also assesses other points that make a big difference, like logistics and training. This stuff can make or break an army, so it's important to give it some consideration.

The weapons were almost a tossup because they were both along the same timeline. After watching the show, I want a cannon of my very own to shoot in the backyard for fun. I see them from time to time on trailers towed by my fellow Virginians; maybe I'll follow the next one I see into a gas station and chat up the owner!

Only in Fairfax

One man may be responsible for stabbing at least five women in the butt, according to Fairfax County police.

The headline "Serial Butt Stabber Sought in Virginia" kinda drew my attention first thing this morning. This type of criminal behaviour doesn't surprise me at all considering that it's happening in Fairfax, which is like the San Francisco of Virginia.

Then again, in once-quiet Fredericksburg, Virginia, some creepo is flashing the ladies at McDonald's, so anything can happen. Strange times bring out strange behaviour.

Full auto Glock 17 with tracers

Alright, this is very cool. I do hope that he can account for where the ricochetting bullets go though. When he fires off the tracer rounds, you can see them skip off the steel plate and go up into the air.


I wouldn't mind a full auto conversion for my Glock!

Range Report: Dale Fricke Zacchaeus holster review

Yesterday I did some shooting from the Dale Fricke Zacchaeus holster that I reviewed last week, and I must say I am a fan. Draws were smooth and snag free, and the holster performed perfectly. It is now my EDC holster.

I actually finished a long write up of this post just now, but Blogger.com ate it. So this is what you get this morning until I can finish it later.

You suck, Blogger.com

Ninja, WHAT!!!

That's twice this week I've used the word Ninja in a post title.

This story complete with graphic video is not for the squeamish, but I'll drop a spoiler and say that the boy was ok. I don't really think there's much of a lesson to draw from this; freak accidents happen, and boys will be boys. Still, seeing my kid with a spear through his neck would raise my blood pressure a bit.

Consumer backlash

This one has nothing to do with the normal host of things posted here, but hit close to home since I've been screwed over by car salesman more times than I can count:

PORTSMOUTH — Unhappy that a Lafayette Road car dealer wouldn't take back the van he bought on Monday, David Cross drove "the lemon" back after the dealer closed on Tuesday and crashed it into six cars parked on the lot for sale.

"I hit the first $25,000 car I could see," Cross told the Herald. "I didn't hit a car under $20,000. Then I moved a van that they wouldn't come down on the price for. I moved it with the lemon they sold me. I just held it to the floor until I couldn't move it anymore. I took out seven vehicles, including my own."

I'm not condoning behaviour like that, as the only thing it solves is the need for short term gratification of one person, but I can feel the guy's pain; car salesman have the potential to be genuine scumbags, and have left people completely hosed over an expensive item.

I've never lost it like that and destroyed property, but one time many years ago my brother and I were bored and broke, and he was wondering out loud about how to finance a car. I had been there and done that before with the scars to prove it, so we swung into a local car dealership and I went through the entire process -- test drive, bartering; right up until the yellow sales sheet was cut. We had been there for about four hours before we walked out. It wasn't the righteous thing to do, but it sure did feel good, and years later my wife and I were screwed over pretty good by the same dealership. . . .twice, so I guess I had it coming.

Very recently my lady and I bought a mini van to better shuttle our growing tribe, and the salesman that we dealt with was brand new on the job, was a Vietnam veteran, and was as honest as the day was long. I told him as much, and that I was thankful to deal with someone who had not acquired the sleazy aura that car salesman often do. Being real has a value all on its own.

This is why I don't fly anymore

His ordeal began last Friday when airport security in Freeport, Bahamas found a .32-caliber bullet inside his fanny pack. He was charged with possessing ammunition and sent to a jail in Nassau. Lapp says he thinks he left the bullet in his pack after a hunting trip.

How would you take it if this happened to you while traveling with family on vacation? I'm certainly capable of overlooking a shell casing or bullet in a travel bag. How about you?

All of these so called security measures that have been enacted around the world rely on policy and not thought. One security yahoo with the capability to produce conscious thought would have kept an innocent man out of jail if he or she were only able to act on what they know, and not on what a zero-tolerance policy tells them to.

Ninja leopard attack

A group of Indian men armed with rifles try to take on an angry leopard, which promptly wrecks their shit, leaving six of the men bleeding. The beasty was finally stopped with a tranquilizer gun, but only after it was shot with a rifle.

There's a whole lot of fuck that in this picture of the leopard jumping up at a box truck, trying to kill the guy aiming a rifle at his face. From the looks of the other men, they've had enough. I take it picking on a pissed off leopard is a bad idea?

Fictitious guns save lives

I am in contact with the LGBT unit of the police department to file a report. But I’ve thought a lot about the turning point of the situation — the fact that one of them thought that I might have a gun. None of them said, “There’s a law against antigay hate crimes!” That wasn’t the deterrent. It was the possibility that I might have had a gun that saved my life Friday night.

I admit that I chuckled a bit at that line. Good for him that he didn't get his head kicked in; he was fortunate. Scumbags know that laws can be broken without too much of a problem; but that part about getting a hole punched through their head by their victim -- that is a deterent, now isn't it!

H/T to The Agitator

AIWB Carry: The Dale Fricke Zacchaeus Holster

. . .and a wee little man was he.

I just got received two Dale Fricke Zacchaeus "Zack" holsters in the mail today; one of them for a Kel-Tec P3AT and one for Glock. I've only worn the one for the Glock, and have been impressed enough that I thought I would do a review of the Zack for your entertainment.





The Zack is as minimalist as a holster can get -- kind of like a speedo for your handgun. I see it as a modernized version of using a looped shoestring to keep your pistol from falling down into your pants. The first thing you notice about the holster is that it significantly cuts down on the bulk of plastic that you will have inside your pants. Comparing it to the modified BladeTech IWB holster in the 2nd picture you will notice the disparity in bulk; there simply is none with the Zack, and you only have to contend with concealing the pistol and not the holster and straps. It's very well made, and is profiled so that it doesn't interfere with the relief under the Glock's trigger guard where the knuckle of your middle finger sits.

I modified that BladeTech holster in the above pictures with a rubber plug that helps torque the grip in towards the body, aiding in concealing the grip:



It does add some chunk inside your waistband, but it does the trick well. The Zack holster does not have any sort of material or device to torque the grip in towards the body, but I don't think that it needs to, and may in fact violate the whole concept of this holster. To give you an idea of what I'm talking about, here's a downward shot of the Zack with a Glock 17 tucked in my waistband:



And here just for instructional purposes I stuck a Fenix flashlight in between my belt and the Zack to show you how it can turn the grip in towards my guts:



The flashlight/lump of material obviously aids in concealment, but adds a great deal of mass to what is supposed to be a simple minimalist holster. One of the greatest benefits of the Zack is that it makes the firearm all but disappear when you are sitting down, like when you're driving. It feels like the gun is not even there. The main reason for this is the narrow profile of steel and plastic that is down your pants towards your crotch - the BladeTech has all that kydex that surrounds the muzzle, and it pushes up against your body.

With appendix carry (AIWB) the muzzle and holster fall into the crease where your thigh connects to your hip. There's a natural pocket there, and that's what you're looking for. With the BladeTech, I can comfortably AIWB but it took several days of trial and error to find the sweet spot, as I had to do a bit of adjusting to learn where it was just right. The Zack will work its way into that sweet spot in a few minutes walking around the house, and will stay there all day. It is not going to be as firmly fixed and stationary to your belt as a holster with a hard point belt loop, as it has a tendency to move a little here or there while it maintains its place in the sweet spot on your belt, but this aids in comfort. This brings me in to how the Zack attaches to your belt.

The Zack is affixed to the belt by a simple looped string. I didn't take pictures of this, but you push the loop down in between your pants and belt (right around the 1st belt loop) and then run the loop up over the holster. That's it. The Zack snaps onto the trigger guard firmly, and you then tuck the gun down into your waistband and you're done. The Zack holds the gun with enough grip that a full up loaded Glock 17 will dangle there if you let it hang, and I doubt will come off on its own even if you got into a foot chase. Drawing is literally a snap, as when you pull your piece the Zack reaches the end of the string and is pulled off the trigger guard with an audible snap. I found that I could adjust the depth of how the gun sits in the waistband by where I put the knot in the cord on the Zack, so that the gun sits about a half inch from the belt:



The shorter you make the looped cord, the higher the gun sits and the faster the Zack pops off the trigger guard when you draw. The muzzle gets about an inch outside of the waistband when the holster lets go, which is perfect. It's very fast to put on, and only takes a moment. Just loop the Zack onto your belt, click it onto your trigger guard and tuck the whole thing into your belt line. You can do this while seated in your car at a stop light. The Zack completely encapsulates the trigger, so nothing can make its way down into it and touch the trigger.

As far as concealment goes, I was surprised at how the Zack can make a full sized handgun disappear. Though it doesn't tuck the grip in like my modified BladeTech, there's not as much stuff jammed between your belt and your guts like rubber or plastic loops and such, so it's easy to conceal, and you can also tuck your shirt in over the gun. The looped cord is not noticeable at all, and would be hard to spot against a black belt, and even harder to spot when the tail of a 5.11 rigger's belt is velcro'd over it:




I didn't try to fluff that button down shirt out to help with concealment; I actually tucked it in pretty tight. You will notice also that my cargo pants are pulled up a little high there above the fly in that last picture; I was trying to hurry as it was late, and I quickly tucked in the shirt and took the picture.

I wouldn't hesitate to wear the Zack with a full sized gun with a button down shirt and tie. Even twisting and turning doesn't reveal much, if anything. I do still recommend a tucked in undershirt for all things AIWB though; it keeps the grip of your firearm from grabbing at your skin when you sit and stand. For a couple of days now I've worn the Zack with the Glock 17 in public after work, concealed with a T-Shirt, and it's good to go. Nobody can spot it, and I'm confident that it will stay in place and I can make a quick draw if I ever need to. If you're looking for a svelt, comfortable holster at a minimal price, this might be for you.

What happens when you divide by zero?

A law enforcement officer that is a commenter on ARFCOM was the victim of a felony traffic stop and arrest in front of his wife and kids at a revenueing speed trap over an out of state warrant for weapons charges and being an unregistered sex offender. The warrants turned out to be for someone else; someone of different color and birthday. The only thing that expedited his ass out of the police station was a fortuitous notice by another cop of that the victim's race was not the same as on the warrant. Since the victim is a LEO, he was treated far different at the station than someone not of that status.

It's a shame that this man will forever have this arrest and charges associated with his name, even if the record is expunged. It's permanent, and so is the sight of his kids and wife watching him be arrested and treated like a scumbag for a crime he didn't commit.

This is exactly why I now fear law enforcement. I think many good hearted Americans fear being the innocent victim of some computer glitch or human error and being yanked out of their car or having their door kicked in and dog shot over some victimless crime; the former having happened to me when I was a teenager. It's not fun. There is very permanent damage done over these sort of things, and often the whole thing is initiated over a crime that was not hurting anyone.

Up until fairly recently I strongly wanted to become law enforcement, but changed my mind as I didn't like where the trade was heading. I hope the cop in the linked story gets everything worked out, and hopefully becomes a better officer because of it.

Concealed holster thread

Currently at 47 pages over at Defensive Carry forums. I've already seen a bunch of holsters from makers that I had never heard of. There's CCW stuff for the ladies as well.

**HA! I've never seen IWB carry like this! Kinda wins the SD caliber wars pretty handily, too.

Legion's Fate Special Products Division

I'm thinking about starting a product line of a special super epoxy that I've learned to make. I have found that if you combine equal parts of Kellogg's Special K Corn Flakes and milk, then let it sit for a day in the sink, you form a bond on the molecular level that cannot be broken. I find it works on all sorts of surfaces, but I get the best results on ceramics; handy if you need to permanently glue them into a large stack for some reason.

Special Forces stick to walls

Nothing in this world gets me worked up like military themed video games, with a close second going to driving games. Naturally, I'm drawn to 1st person shooters and strategy games considering my background, but the ridiculous things that they put into them gets my blood boiling like nothing else. I am not pleasant when I play video games.

So these days the trend is to make military 1st person shooters as realistic as possible, but it never fails that some idiot makes it into the design team, and that person is the problem why modern 1st person shooters suck. If the design team would just send the creepy guy with the red stapler to the basement, I wouldn't loose my shit when I'm meticulously slaying mercenaries at distance from cover, about to win it, only to be eaten by a virtually invincible man-eating german shepherd.

Starting out with a positive, the most realistic 1st person shooter I've ever encountered, and a fine example of how to do it right is Medal of Honor Limited Edition. It somewhat follows a realistic story line, is exciting, and is noticeably void of the stupid man-eating dogs that can only be killed with the precise timing of a single button, and not with a knife. The design team for that game sent stapler boy and his wild-assed ideas to the basement with the accountants and lawyers. Well done.

The worst examples of 1st person shooters, and a stern warning of how to not make them is the Ghost Recon series of games. Full disclosure: I can't stand Tom Clancy. I've actually written him non-fan mail, begging him to stop making books, games, and movies that have anything at all to do with the military. Just. Stop. Tom Clancy has made me do more facepalms than any other writer, and I can't imagine how anyone takes him seriously. It would be as if I went out and became a foremost known authority in interior design because I read Wikipedia articles on the subject all day and knew a few gay guys. It doesn't make any sense.

The first time I wrote him a letter was over the first Ghost Recon game, where you are a supposed Special Forces team that has to decide whether you want to carry grenades, explosives, extra ammo, or a pistol, because your special ass can't seem to carry all of the above like in real life. Also, just once it would be cool to have a team that could actually kill bad guys and possibly spare you from not losing the game from gunfire from your six. Pathetic. The only thing I found good about the game is that your character gains experience with every mission. The succeeding Ghost Recon games were absolutely awful, and I tossed those games in the trash after the first mission of two.

The most recent target of my rage is the game Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. The fanciful characters and story line in the game are unrealistic but entertaining none the less, and are not the reason for my angst. No, the worst part about this game are the Juggernauts. Stapler guy should be dragged out behind the woodshed and flogged on his face with a handfull of rabid foxes for getting those things in there. He must have seen an EOD suit on teevee one day and, the squirrels running full speed in that fantastic mind of his, decided that they absolutely must be in the game. Genius. The design team no doubt rolled their eyes at that suggestion, but for some reason decided to appease stapler guy and allow it in. I mean, the EOD suit protects from explosions, right? So it stands to reason that it would also resist the .50 BMG, M18s, 40mm grenades, and pretty much anything else!

The Juggernauts flat out ruin what would be an otherwise decent game. Too bad that stapler boy also got the man-eating dogs in there as well. Why in the world would you put so much effort into making a game as realistic as possible, only to ruin it with invincibly huge soldiers in bomb suits that can't see and dogs that can take several rounds in the vitals and still eat you? What were they thinking? Your supposed to be an elite SAS Soldier who kills bad guys all day, swimming out of a submarine and popping up out of the ice cold sea and head-shooting baddies, but one falls move has a mutt precisely tearing your throat out after you shot him nine times? Blaaaaauuuuggggghhhhh!!! Keep that shit.

All 1st person shooters though have the phenomenon that I call "Special Forces Stick to Walls." Any rock, fence, bush, tuft of grass, wall, vehicle, or artifact in the game will stop you cold, allowing the enemy to smoke your ass because you can't get off the X. Your such a special operator that you can't step over a clump of weeds, instead getting hung up there until you get killed.

Smooooooooth Operrrrataaahhhh. Why do I suddenly have Sade in my head?

Anyways, I know games are not really real life and all, but I would appreciate if designers would look at 1st person shooter games that don't suck, like Medal of Honor, and strive to be like them. Stop letting the pimply faced kid that lives with his mother and plays airsoft in multicam make characters and storyline for military games. Maybe hire someone who was in the military or perhaps a real life Special Operator and let him vett out all the crap. Sound like a good idea?

Lots of 1st person perspective on Philly mob attack

There's a bunch of details here from a dozen victims of the Philly attack a couple of weeks ago. The girl that was injured the worst had to have surgery to repair her shattered tibia; I still call that serious bodily harm. The victims who were physically attacked all reported being punched in the neck and the back of the head, with some of them getting stomped on the head while they were in the fetal position. Also, several of them noted that there was nothing taken from them; in other words, this wasn't a bunch of kids trying to steal their wallet; their intent was to beat people up.

All of the victims tried to run away, but were quickly caught by the teenaged attackers and punched to the ground. The victims were not exchanging words or taunting the attackers; the first blow came from an attacker who ran up from out of nowhere. Interestingly enough, one of the victims had this to say:

Unless you are literally Charles Bronson, you just don’t win fights where you’re outnumbered 20 to 1, even if you have a gun.

I believe that if you had to shoot one of the attackers, the rest of them would most likely run off. That's my guess, anyways. I wouldn't expect a victim would have to shoot every attacker like they were a horde of zombies, especially considering that they're teenagers most of the time.

Two things though are of immediate concern to me as I consider what would happen if I couldn't avoid a flash mob and was attacked. First is that I'm likely to have my kids with me, and we've already seen that attackers have no problems attacking little kids. With all the accounts from these attacks recently, I have every belief that my kids, my family, and I would be seriously hurt or killed in such an attack. My second concern is ending up on the ground in the fetal position while dozens of kids stomp me, and having my gun taken away and getting shot with it. Staying upright and trying to gain some control is paramount, again, if you cannot avoid an attack in the first place.

I don't live in a major city where I would expect a mob attack, but that's not to say that it couldn't happen.

Guns of Tokyo Drifter

Head on over to Hell in a Handbasket to see a Movie Guns post on the film Tokyo Drifter. I'm glad James has picked up the torch with Movie Guns posts since I haven't done one in quite awhile. I had high hopes when I got my laptop rebuilt a couple of months ago, but it only lasted a few weeks before completely crashing.

Saving the world from warriors and knife collectors

TSA spokesman Kawika Riley says an officer operating an X-ray machine at Thurgood Marshall Baltimore-Washington International Airport last week noticed something suspicious in the man’s luggage, and a fellow officer’s search turned up the knives. Riley says they included switchblade knives and a butterfly knife.

This wouldn't be the first time some dude lost all of his knives to the meat-gazing, kiddie -fondling, TSA pecker-checkers at the security checkpoint at BWI; I have had almost the exact same thing happen to me once while on my way to the beautiful beach-like resort of Ramadi in the exciting province of Al-Anbar, and I guess it would be alright if I told another whopper of a story this week about that experience:

About five years ago I had a task to go to Iraq as a contractor on a program for a year, and I had a lot of training to get done in a short amount of time which meant that I had little time to pack. I was offered the services of a company that ordered a large portion of the equipment that I needed, and my time to pack it came the night before I was to leave from BWI to El-Paso for processing into South West Asia.

I packed all through the night waiving all of my time to sleep, and the finished product was two very packed seabags, a lock box to transport my M9, ammo, and magazines, and my ruck that was almost ripping at the seams from my gear. My wife took me to the airport that morning to see me off and, having very recently married to compensate for the timing of this trip, and the fact that she was saying good bye to her husband for a year while he went to a dangerous place to do dangerous things, she was not in high spirits. Neither was I.

I checked the two seabags and my M9, at which point the ticket lady said that I could not check any more baggage, but my ruck was small enough that it would pass as a carry on item. Tears were already flowing at this point and my mind was elsewhere, so I shrugged my shoulders and grabbed the ruck and headed over to the security station. I was the only one being checked at that moment, as there was nobody in line, so I kissed my wife goodbye and watched her walk around the corner before picking my ruck up and putting it onto the conveyor for an x-ray.

By that time a few other travelers had shown up for the violation of their rights, body and property, and I was cursing under my breath at whichever one of those morons was holding up the x-ray machine; I needed to get going to catch my flight. There was a dogpile of TSA goons at the x-ray machine, all in one great big confused ball, and then two police officers showed up and postured themselves like something was wrong.

Then it hit me. . . .

"Oh. OH! Yeah, about that bag. . . .hey guys, uhhhmmm. . . . I know what y'all are looking at, and I can explain" I said to the TSA people, because I had just realized the mistake that I had made at the ticket counter. All of my knives were in my ruck, along with an MSR stove and empty aluminum fuel bottle, several large sharpening stones (a TSA goon asked me if they were "rune stones." Amazing), and also my desert boots and cammies and stuff. I had intended to check that bag, but in the moment of everything I had forgot that I had packed my 8" tanto Ka-Bar, CRKT M21-04 folder, Cold Steel Arc-Angel balisong, Klein folding electrician's knife, and Gerber and Leatherman multi-tools, and had just carried them right into a security checkpoint.

This was all a misunderstanding because I wasn't trying to sneak them through security, and I had no intentions of harming anyone in this country with those knives, so I hoped that cooler heads would prevail and I would be escorted back to the ticket counter. That turned out to be a stupid idea.

I was promptly arrested and charged with the same charges the man in the above article was charged with. The arresting officer and his Sergeant were realists about it, telling me that this happens all the time and that Soldiers, Marines and such go to jail left and right for forgetting that they have a knife in their pocket or a multitool in their bag. The Sergeant even told me that he had to arrest a Marine Brigadier General the week before who forgot his loaded M9 was in his briefcase when he flew back from Iraq.

One older officer there though --officer Diddlydooright -- was a complete and total fucking moron, and was a constant douchebag about every little thing even though I was as calm and cooperative as I could be and had shown everyone my government orders, ID, cammies, and the ticket stub from my M9 that I checked at the ticket counter. Why would I try to smuggle a bunch of knives on a plane to do harm when I had a pistol and ammo? That didn't matter to Diddlydooright.

He flipped out that I even had a gun; flipped out when he found holsters in my ruck, yelling at me about "why do you need a holster!?!?" I told him I was on my way to Iraq; you know, that hot place where Americans are being shot at? I held up my government orders that stated where I was going, and that I was to be armed while I was there, signed by a Major General, so that Diddlydooright could see it, and his eyes glazed over like I had just told him I was heading to Ohio. "You don't need a gun! You don't need a holster! This is a SWAT TACTICAL KNIFE! What are you doing with a SWAT knife?!?"

IIIIIRRRRRAAAAAQQQQQ. He didn't get it.

That fucktard cop tormented me for hours and hours while I was booked. When he measured and photographed my knives, he recorded the blade size as being the entire length of the knife. About every fifteen minutes he would come by, pick up my CRKT, and then shout at me for having a SWAT TACTICAL KNIFE! "What err yeeew dooooooin' with a SWAT TACTICAL KNIFE?!?" Then he would stick me in a cell. Ten minutes later when the arresting officer or the Sergeant would come by and see me in there, they would shake their head and pull me out of there and uncuff me, letting me sit quietly in a chair next to them. Whenever officer Fuckface would walk by or try to talk to the other officers, they would roll their eyes or respond to him with a snarky comment. Whenever they would leave, officer Fuckface Von-diddlydooright would come by, sigh out loud, put cuffs on me and stick me back in the cell. I had the impression that everyone was waiting for his ass to retire.

The arresting officer eventually took me before the Magistrate, who let me go on my own recognizance. She also said flatly that this happens all the time, and that the officers are not allowed any discretion to solve the matter without arrest. There's the door - good luck.

By the time that I got to El-Paso about eighteen hours had passed. I still hadn't slept and was a very bitter person to say the least, and my anger was about to go full into the red. When I got to the unclaimed luggage office, the lights were off and no one was there. A stack of luggage four foot high completely filled the office and spilled ten feet out into the lobby; and there at the very end of the stack was the shitty plastic lockbox that held my M9, six magazines, and two fifty round boxes of 124 grain NATO ball ammo - a shitty plastic lockbox that could be opened with a paper clip.

Way to make the world a safer place with that zero tolerance policy. You guys really saved the day.

I ended up having to spend $2,000 on a lawyer to settle the charges. I tried to handle it on my own by calling the Clerk of the Court from an Iridium sat phone while sitting in the sand next to a dumpster, explaining to her my situation, but was told that if I missed my court date they would issue a warrant for my arrest and I would come home a fugitive. Tough shit.

I never did get the $600 in knives back. I picked up another Ka-Bar in Texas, and also a Benchmade Rukus to put in my pocket, and they served and still serve me well. I wonder about how many Servicemen and Servicewomen get jammed up in the gears of "justice" while trying their best to do their duty under adverse conditions. I have no doubts that the poor guy in the article above really is a knife collector, and just made a mistake. At least he doesn't have to go to war after being processed through jail.